Contracted herpes from someone who you knew had it, but chose to take the risk

I wasn't disclosed to but saw that my boyfriend at the time (now husband) was getting cold sores about 6 months into our relationship. After confronting him on it, he said he had it since he was a kid. Since we had not used protection up to that point, I figured I was already exposed and nothing changed between us precaution wise. I will admit at the time we thought we were safe as long as he was not having an outbreak (this was over 15 yrs ago). A few months later I had my first (genital) outbreak.

-I wasn't devastated when I was diagnosed for two reasons. One we were already planning a wedding. Two, I took a risk. I knew he had the virus. I didn't necessarily know all the facts and yet I can't blame him for that.

-I dont resent him for it

- I've never thrown it in his face when I was angry BUT he has thrown it in mine- that kind of leads to your next question.

- The only time I've regretted taking that risk was when HE brought it up during fights. What if I had it all along and just didn't know? or.. What if I've given it to him genitally after all these years and now hes doubly infected? We even had a fight where there were people present and he's made a snide crack about having genital herpes. I don't regret that I took the risk with him because of the virus, but because as you can see he doesn't always have the best character. So.. that being said, I took the risk because I loved him, and I don't regret taking that risk, but maybe my choice in partners. If it was not for the other issues we have, I would definitely take that risk again.

- It was not hard for me to get past being infected. I was in a relationship with my giver and it didn't change things for us. We were married, had three (H-) children, and life just went on.

- We are currently having issues in our marriage, and are separated at the time. I can honestly, and without a doubt, say that any anger I harbor towards him has nothing to do with HSV.

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